Lullaby

I tried singing my demon a lullaby
But he wouldn’t sleep
Your pain had awakened my twin of May
He altered my white wings to black
For myself is too proud to allow itself getting hurt
And so it defied letting you live in peace

Darling,
Had I not told you your presence sealed my Satan away
But you’re not there anymore
I wanted someone to blame when everyone departed away
And my pain chose you, most beloved and most brittle
Excuse me not
But you hurt a part of me and I cannot bear my pain

Darling,
Let these words be injected to your veins that shall conquer your heart
“I’d throw myself off the rock if you were to leave” I said
But I had to leave it seems
I love you so much not to hurt myself
So I hurt you instead
Excuse me not
But I unconsciously did lust your pain

And when I killed you
I could no longer sense my demon
It seems he rested in peace
But then Darling,
The Jesus in me bled my name from your pain
For you bled yours cause of mine
He’s dying at the gates of the fairytale I call life
And so, I beg you
Bring him back to life
Excuse me not
But I love you so much to let you go away.

A Game of Love and Karma

Dare not to say sorry when I know you’re not
For you’re ugly when you lie
You should be sorry for the act you denied
You killed me with your game that you played unconsciously
Bullshitted me with a pathetic song
Told me I love you when you know you didn’t
Told me you missed me when you told your friend you didn’t
Demanded kisses when your heart climaxed rejecting me
Told me its right when I knew things were going wrong
And you still have no regrets

And for that
I’ll tell you the sight I still crave:

When you’re in pain
I smile cause to me its personal gain
When you cry
I laugh that your heart has just died
When you frown
I’m glad you’ve just been put down

Take a look back and remember
You fooled me with a game entitled “love”
And you excused yourself with “you got hung up”
And then I’m a zombie
I want to dissemble your bones
Slice up your veins except for the aorta
I want you alive
But I want to witness the sight when you’re like a fish
A fish that has been banned its home
So pathetically breathing, lying, dying on the ground
And then karma stops my desire

You’ve changed from a demon into an angel
What I’ve been telling you to be has been granted
But no thanks to me
For I took on love from below
But he took it with you from high and high above

I never thought I’d cry tears of happiness
But I did when you loved someone so much
When you asked for more time but you were denied
When you were shocked you called him your one and only
But you ended up not being his one and only
When you got too hung up and you thought he’d give up something for you
When he was the center of your world, but you weren’t
My purple tear drops have turned colorless and bitter
You were fooled into a game called “love”
And apparently, you were too hung up

Your pain is my pleasure
Your gain is my loss
Your sorrow is my bliss
Your tears are injections of morphine to my pain
Your screams are my lullaby
Your internal death is what I lust

And in the end I confess to you
I am yet to avenge my penetrated heart

I Breathe

In the streets of this warm city
The fancy skyscrapers
The cozy atmosphere
Under the lights of the roads
I feel numb from all the pain
So sedated and drugged I am
I could just stop and stare all day

And I walk along these roads
With my black and grey textured bunnyhug
My music, my only best friend
And I smile
For they make me feel so safe, isolated, and free

But as I walk
My hands swing against intangible air
Deprived for a hand to hold
Not a friend, not an ancestor
But a lover
A dear beloved to pour-in happiness into my half empty glass of happiness

And when I see two lovers walking happily
My throat hurts
And it feels as if all my tears are hidden on the top of my mouth
My bronchioles as if they are shuddered
But I walk on with silence and no complains
For he who elicited me into his chaotic creation
Has dimmed my voice and numbed my speech

Yin and Yang

In the name of optimism
The knot you tied shall inflict you with satisfaction
The oath you made shall wrap you with the independence of commitment
The hell you lived shall bring back your deceased flesh into life
For the blessing of love will leave you replenished
Have you breathe freely
Dry up your moist eyes
Reincarnate your emotions
And rejuvenate your lifespan
In the name of love
I now pronounce you Cupid and Victim

…

In the name of pessimism
The knot you tied shall inflict you with affliction
The oath you made shall drill your veins into walls of imprisonment
The heaven you shared shall turn into fire that burns your flesh up into ashes
For the curse of love will leave you drained
Make you exhale but never inhale
Bleed your eyes dry
Disperse your emotions
And kill you slowly
In the name of love
I now pronounce you Assassin and Victim

…

In the name of reality
After every angry volcanic eruption
The disastrous lava creates a new vast green land
After every overload of black clouds
A peak of light cracks through to rinse the ominous ambience
For to achieve success you need to fail
To see the light, you need to go through the darkness
We cry when we’re sad
Yet we cry when we’re at the orgasmic peak of bliss
Therefore in the name of life
I now pronounce you Yin and Yang

Inspired by: Hassan Al Marashi

Speechless

That night
That night when the moon was full
The Fake Island and city
The fake IDs, the Vodka, Beer and the Whiskey
So out of our minds, we just needed the drugs too

That night
I can’t forget how you looked at me with those brown eyes
That Johnny Depp hat of yours
So drunk everything was blurry except for you
So drunk that it felt sober just being around you

That night
In the back of the car we kissed
The taste of your lips still occupies my senses
Your aura numbed my nerves
And your warm breath left my heart mended
…
Out of all those that follow me
I still can’t believe that you got me
I felt so happy I could die
And next time you see me day dreaming
Spare asking what took over my mind
You know the answer more than I could ever imply

I came back home the next day
So angry and lost I just wanted to stay
I threw all the books around looking for my dictionary
So crazy I was the books I threw broke and ashtray
all 1286 pages I read
But no word I read best described you
And I realized that you've left me speechless
so speechless I thought I'll never write again
just speechless

Fearless

I took on a journey
A journey of materialism
The journey of joyful pain
Torturing pleasure and gain
And as I walked amongst people
I found a boy with a plastic rainbow
His eyes spoke words that the tongue never dares to spell
So I stared onto their moist soil that is craving a sun to dry them up
The melody of his eyes took my hands and drove me into his journey
A journey amongst his peers

And as I observed his world
He'd look at me and point out at his peers
And he quietly said

"Look at them, my world and family
With them I share the joy and agony
They love me to bits
But too much love is catastrophe"

The boy goes silent
And I observe again as he gets ready to speak
I interrupt his words and say

"They love you too much it's become unhealthy
And I know you love them too
But their love has driven them blind
And so they grasp onto you”

And the boy nods, turns red and tense
Unleashes sealed words and anger
“And they’ve raped me dry
Drained my energy and broken my wings to fly
Angels indeed they are
But after all
Satan is an angel too
…
So they tend to help make me live
And not commit the sinful deed that surrenders my soul to the dark side
But with what they claim is help
They kill me indeliberately
…
Their love towards me injects them with doses of selfishness
That they repelled the one I truly love
…
They married me without a proposal
Intoxicated the air I breathe
Forced me to live a lithium that satisfies them
…
And as I’m being smothered by their destructive love
I love them still
And all I hope for is that when they slay me unconsciously
They get away with murder”

So my journey goes on
As I watch his life burn away into ashes by those who love him most
And I only pray that love won’t take away his life.

Avant-Garde

Under a pornographic red light
Filthy red colored words polished onto the walls
With thorny stems scattered all over the room

I’ll crawl into bed with you
Caress and roll all over it with my arms firmly wrapped around yours
As these thorny stems rip off each others clothes until naked
Drenched with blood after our skins are slashed
The white sheets turn red
And these thorns are smashed by the intensity of our bodies rubbing

I’ll clench onto your lips with mine
Squash them passionately with my teeth
Let their red wine pour out
To gently water my lifeless lips for they are dry

And as we start off with soft
We let our bodies become one
As if we’ve been tied up by a Celtic metallic chain
And since we’re soaked with each others blood
We’re left unprotected from each others disease
This makes me crave you more
Thus
Let’s whisper dirty words into each others ears
Let those words trigger our gradually awakening beasts
And engage into an endless act of love
That is an Ambigram of endless hardcore
Until we’re left sweaty and breathless

These thorns have indeed bled me dry
But worry not
For I'm alive as long as I'm assassinated by your brown eyes
And the sharing of your disease gave me the pleasure to live your pain
Get reincarnated with you again in the after-life
And if loving you is a sin
Then let the angel of death take away my life
Where hell shall be my eternal reside.